Sunday, May 25, 2008

Separation Anxiety?????? Or Maybe Not........

The last week or so I have noticed a remarkable difference in Rhett. As in I can no longer leave his side.

I mean, he has always been a momma's boy. We are extremely close, the love and the bond is amazing, not to toot my own horn or anything, but he knows that I am the one that is always there for comfort no matter what.

But usually when we are home, I can walk out of the room, switch the laundry, do dishes, change bedding, whatever.

This is why this last week has become worrisome for me. All of the sudden I can't step out of his vision. If I do he screams, I am not exaggerating, he literally just screams, as if someone is beating him. Even if I am in the kitchen and there is the gate separating us, yet he can still see me, just knowing that he can't touch me he flips out.

He has been crying out in his sleep as well at night, which is unusual for him. I don't know what's going on.

I can't quite figure out how a two and a half year old suddenly develops separation anxiety. Not when he has been okay thus far. I mean, he even has Andy pick him up, just so that he cant get closer to me. I mean I am glad this little guy can talk, but he goes around calling "Mom" all day long, and if I walk away from him, even to go to the bathroom, he is screaming "NOOOO!!!" at me.

I just don't get it, it makes me wonder if something is going on. He has been running a very small fever last night and today, but as long as I am by him he seems to be okay. I have been running extra water through his feeding tube because his eyes are getting that dark look to them, and his poop has gotten really hard again, so I wonder if he is a little dehydrated. He keeps signing thirsty to me, but I can't give him a drink. When he signs thirsty, I usually hand him a wet wash cloth to chew on, making sure it' been rung out really well first. I can only imagine that his mouth gets dry now that he can't have anything orally.

Ugh, I hate the guessing game.

8 comments:

Carla said...

You sound so worried in this post! My son Gavin is the same way, and he just turned 3. He has maor separation anxiety, he wont even be in a room without me. Now, he is not healthy either, but I think it is a common thing for kids this age--especially those with medical issues. I find we bond more often and deeper with our sick kids and when they get old enough to exert some independence, they get scared. Then add feeling a bit "off" to it, and it creates that. Gavin even cries out in his sleep almost every night, and he is in our bed! I know it is impossible to not worry, but know you and Rhett are not the only ones dealing with this! I am praying for you....
Love,
Carla, momswearingpuke.org

Kari said...

You sound so worried. You know T was always happy go lucky then at around this age he too developed seperation anxiety and his personality changed alot. When T was Rhetts age he was going through alot of medical stuff (nothing like Rhett) but alot of traumatic testing. I thought this was the reason for the change but it turned out to be a Milestone. We always celebrate the good and worry about the bad. I hope that maybe that's all this is. Maybe he has a better understanding of coming and going KWIM? Tristan also screams out in his sleep alot even now after surgery is well over with. My Resp believes he still has apnea and we are going to be doing the sleep study again UGH. Anyway I thought I'd share our seperation experience because you just sounded so Darn upset. I thought maybe it could make you feel a bit better. (((HUGS)))
BTW I am taking an internet break that's why I have been MIA but your still always in my thoughts and prayers!

Niksmom said...

Sounds like Rhett is beginning to test the limits and explore control. We went through that with Nik not too long ago. Where he used to be happy playing on his own as I wandered in and out doing chores, he went through a period where he did not want to be alone. Since he as no language, he would start banging his head on the floor or screaming hysterically. It's better now but he still does it sometimes to tell me he's bored and needs more attention or more stimulation. It's a challenging phase!

I hope that's all it is w/Rhett. Sending hugs and healthy thoughts!

jessica said...

Joey has started the separation anxiety thing... I can't even go to the bathroom without him freaking out. Fun times...

Leah said...

Angela had all liquids tubed for several years. I tubed her the same liquids I would have tubed if she was drinking them...milk and water, and sometimes prune juice...Ask your nutritionist how much water you should be tubing. Angela had 4 ounces every 2 hours. That seems like a lot to me, but it's how much a toddler was SUPPOSED to be drinking! She was the most well hydrated child I knew. LOL If he's well hydrated, even if it's by tube, his mouth will not get dry and he will not feel thirsty. There are a lot of kids in the world who never ever have anything orally, and they're not thirsty IF they're getting enough liquids.

Kaden and Angel Ava's mommy said...

I thought the same as you...I wonder if he is not feeling well or something is causing him pain. But that just might be the paranoia in me. It could be that he is just going through a stage in his life. He is at about that age. I feel though, that if you have any doubt about him not feeling well or something bothering him that you can't see it is always best to take him to the doc to have him checked. Your motherly instinct will tell you what is best in this situation.

Thinking and praying for you all.

Seth, Caralee and Sydney Jo said...

You do sound worried in this post but who could blame you after all that you have been through with this little guy! I am no expert but I do have a lot of experience working with special children like Rhett, I think that it is probably a combination of things that it making him act the way that he is! He knows that when he starts to feel yucky that sometimes he goes to the doctors and they do things to him that he doesn't like. He also knows that when he is sick that you are right by his side doing everything that you can to make him feel better. He has a special bond with you, YOU are the person that helps him feel better and less anxious. My advice is to try to be as consistent as you can with him, give him the extra attention that he is asking for and when he starts to feel better he will most likely start acting like himself again. Make sure you try to take some time for yourself, even if it is just a walk around the block, you will feel better and Rhett will realize that he is alright even when you are out of his sight!
Good luck!!
Caralee

Marla said...

Hugs. I so know what you are going through here. M does the same thing. Even now, after she has been sick and in the hospital for a while her anxiety increases. She follows me around just like you describe. In time it does get better. Try not to worry about it but give him the extra love and hugs he needs. It will pass. I will be praying for you all that he feels more confident soon.

And yet, follow your gut too. If something is not right and you feel he needs to be seen take him in.

But, do know that M has been this way since she was young too.