Thursday, October 30, 2008

My Dearest Rhett.....


I am so glad that you are doing the things that most 3 year olds do. I remember a time when I wondered how severe your disability would be, and what the future would hold for you. I am so glad that you are finally well enough to cause some serious trouble, but can I please lay down some rules for you?

1. The cat does not like his tail pulled. It is also not a chew toy, I am sure Garfield would greatly appreciate it if you would quit using it as such. If you continue to do this to him I will not stop him from jumping off of the top of the stairs onto your head. What goes around comes around my little friend.

2. Your clothes are on you for a reason. I do not put them on you so that you can just take them off. Especially when we are at the Dr's. Not everyone wants to see your sweet buddah belly. Nor your chubby butt for that matter.

3. Your gauze and tape around your g-tube are not for your chewing pleasure. It's just disgusting. I am happy that you are using your fine motor skills to pull the tape off, but really, putting it in your mouth and chewing on it just crosses the line.

4. Poop. The only place it belongs is in your diaper, the dump, or down the potty. It is not the newest wall decoration, nor is it a delicate cuisine. Next time you eat it and say, "Mmmm Good" I may just barf. If you want a bath, just ask, I am sure we can work something out.

5. You are not a table dancer. Please stop stripping and climbing on the table. As much as your brothers and sister laugh about it, I don't think the neighbors enjoy seeing a nakie boy every night when the sun goes down.

6. Toys are for playing with. Not dumping out and seeing how far and fast you can spread them around the house. If you continue to do this you are getting nothing but wrapping paper and boxes for Christmas.....(Big punishment I know.)

7.When we are out in public and I am trying to get you to walk with me please do not lay on the ground and do the crocodile death roll. Especially in the middle of the parking lot where it is totally disgusting. You are getting super big now, and I have a hard time lifting a 30 lb limp noodle that is wriggling all over. It would also be nice if you didn't do this while I am putting you in your carseat. Your name is Rhett, not Sampson the Strong Man.....although that may fit you as well if you ever want to change it.

8. Last but not least, I know my name is Mommy. When you call me and I say what, that means I am listening. You don't need to say it 50 times in a row and get louder each time. I can hear you, I promise. Even if I do choose to ignore you for the 100th time that day.

I love you little buddy, I am so proud of you. For my sanity, let's just tone it down a tiny notch on these things, okay?

18 comments:

My Three Sons said...

Okay, I'm glad I have a happy blog to go to. I'm actually laughing!!! I would like to know if you could possible write a similair letter for Carson to look over. He doesn't have the poop issues but he does like to do a lot of the other ones. LOL.

Take care and I'll update tomorrow when we are out of surgery. Call me if you can. I'll probably be ready to talk to a sane person. My mom, step dad, dad, and sister are going to be with me and they put the word fun in a dysfunctional family.

Ann said...

Oh my gosh I'm doubled over laughing. The 1st thing I thought when reading point 5. As the sun goes down the moon is rising!

Jonathan never discovered taking off his diaper or playing with his poop. And he has never been big on being naked, but he also gets cold easily. Rhett is definitely a firecracker!

Carla said...

I am laughing so hard and trying to be quiet as my family is fast asleep. So funny! Most of them describe Gavin perfectly. 3 year olds are their own kind of breed : )

Niksmom said...

Laughing so hard I'm crying! Especially over #5!! The mental image of Rhett shaing is naked little booty on the table is just too much!

Kari said...

This had me laughing. I have alot of this stuff to I especially love when Tristan decides to drop to the ground in Public. I call it the noodle UGH drives me nuts!

Mrs Wibbs said...

LOL!!!!!

...You wish!!
After all, he IS a boy!
Enjoy...

...and good luck ;o)

L said...

I can't believe he ate his own poop. Yuck!

However the rest of the list, absolutely hilarious. He is such a boy!

Shari said...

OK--giggling here! I remember the days of all those things, but the gauze around the button. Ack! That's icky! He's so cute! I could just pinch those little cheeks and kiss him all day long!

My name is Sarah said...

Boys, boys, boys. Very cute indeed.

Kaden and Angel Ava's mommy said...

That is hilarious...although I won't say that too loud, I don't want the little boy in my belly hearing how funny I think all of that is!!! I did however, kind of cringe (even threw up in my mouth a little, just joking) about the "mmmm good" comment to eating poop. Even as I type this I can't help but giggle. You have one silly boy on your hands, your life has to stay interesting!!!!

Rhett, you are so silly, but one amazing little boy. I think you should continue to do cute and hilarious things, but maybe not so much that you only get wrapping paper for Christmas !!!! Try to follow your mommy's new rules, love you.

Samm said...

Oh boy, I'm glad you gave me a preview of what to (maybe) look forward to. But Rhett is soooo cute it's hard to get mad right?

Becca said...

LOL!! Okay, the poop part is gross, but you've definitely made a heartfelt plea. Let's see if he's listening... He is truly an active little guy, and I'm thrilled that he's doing so wonderfully!

Colleen said...

Thank you for making me laugh so hard that I have tears!! This post was hysterical!! LOL!!

Hugs,
Colleen :)

Kei said...

ok.. I'm laughing so hard I just might PMP!!!!!

Kyle, Aimee and Ava said...

LOL... I needed a good laugh!

Sis Sarah said...

My little one, only tried his own poo once, LOL that is when I new for sure he actually had taste buds. LOL

Are boys the best or what.

Jessica said...

I just about peed my pants laughing at this post! You crack me up!!

Brent & Jodie said...

Rhett, Rhett, Rhett! I love you, you funny boy! Pam, this post made my day. Kiss that little lovey for me!